A couple people in the last few days have brought up the word/act of ‘forgiveness.’ Which has spawned some thinking and ruminating over the origin and how we can live out a life of forgiveness. Some of the statements and questions from others that caused my ruminations begin like this:
It is unbiblical to offer forgiveness to an individual when they have not asked for it and they are not repentant. (statement made to me)
True forgiveness can not happen unless reconciliation takes place. (again, statement)
Can true forgiveness take place even if the relationship isn’t reconciled? (question derived from the previous statement)
This issue of forgiveness is paramount to how we live out our lives in the day to day… It seems many hold to this type of theology (there must be reconciliation), and they always back it with scripture, specifically Mark 2:1-12… which we can talk about later as I think it is taken out of context… allowing many to call the opposing view unbiblical or heretical…
My Short Answer: In my opinion, the aforementioned statements are not in the red letter’s I have been reading, so my answer to the question is in the affirmative, forgiveness can/must happen without reconciliation or the promise thereof.
Sidenote: I like the idea of being a red letter christian.
Explanation: The very word forgiveness in its root implies “giving” “before” to fore give. So how can it be given with a requirement or a stipulation that the person must ask for it… or that there be reconciliation. It seems illogical. Even Jesus in his dealings with sinners, prostitutes, tax collectors, and even his crucifiers (forgive them for they know not what they do), he always seemed for forgive them in spite of their sin. It is how we are to model our lives, in loving our enemy we choose to forgive them before/after/inspite of/because of… the injustices they act out. Jesus always points to our hearts as we help the kingdom of God come to earth, as we join in on this act of love and forgiveness. (see Sermon on the Mount – Matthew 5-7)
For when you pray, pray like this: (another translation/paraphrase of the Lord’s prayer, not mine) Matthew 6:9-13
Our Father in heaven, let your name remain holy.
Bring about your kingdom.
Manifest your will here on earth,
as it is manifest in heaven.
Give us each day our bread, no more, no less,
And forgive us our debts,
as we forgive those who owe us something.
Lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
But let your kingdom be,
and let it be powerful,
and glorious forever, Amen.
In this act of forgiveness we draw upon the incarnational aspect of God (Jesus is God incarnate – in the flesh), a power that was given to us upon the gifting of Sarayu 
That we too can have a little Jesus inside of us, that we become the incarnation, God in flesh, in turn manifesting His will here on this earth, just as it is in God’s presence (heaven).
We ask God to forgive us, and he has no stipulation on this forgiveness, no requirement to receive his grace and mercy, and so too should we live out our lives mirroring this… To give love before love is deserved.
That was a rant, but hopefully it gives you some fodder to chew on.
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I’m curious as to you reference to the Sarayu. Whats your intent in mention this river?
To answer your question, I agree with you in the whole, but I am not arriving to the answer the same way you are.
ahhh don, good question, this post actually started as an email to a friend of mine, in discussion on the book, “The Shack” by William P. Young, a independently published book that has sold over 400,000 copies and has raised a ton of controversy about the depiction of the Trinity… of which Sarayu is the name of the Holy Spirit, which I believe means peaceful river… Great book, go pick it up or borrow mine.
And how are you then arriving? bus, trian, plane or trolly.
This is a good note, Sam. I have been thinking about things like this too.
I think the next question (for me, at least) is whether forgiveness subsequently entails trust. Let’s say someone hurts or offends you, but that person thought he was right in doing so. You disagree; what he did was wrong, but he refuses to repent.
In your heart you do your best to forgive him. But then what? Do you continue to deal with that person exactly as you did before? There is, after all, a high likelihood that such a person would hurt or offend you again and again, never thinking that his actions were wrong. More importantly, he might hurt people close to you.
On the one hand, it seems foolish to trust that person again. And it may be irresponsible, resulting in other people being hurt. But on the other hand, love keeps no record of wrongs; by withholding your trust, have you really forgiven that person? Or is there something to the notion that a person should forgive, but shouldn’t always forget?
Shay, this is a great question. It brings my mind back to a relationship in which I had to forgive a close person for some actions against me… of which I finally did (with much struggle)… My love for this person drove me to forgive him, though it did not mean that I immediately put myself out there to fully trust him…
Forgiveness, in my opinion, does not entail trust, but only love. Let me say it this way, I should forgive and love the person who steals something from me, but this doesn’t mean I open myself up to his thievery every time I see him. If trust is belief in the reliability of something or someone, then trust entails confidence or consistent affirmation in something or someone.
In my mind they are connected, though indirectly… we love and forgive always in the hope that someday they will prove themselves trustworthy, and then we can again put our confidence in them.
Bicycle.
Um.. Lets see if this will make sense.
Again, I believe and think that forgiveness is a one-sided relationship. One needs only to offer forgiveness and not wait for the receiver to accept it.
Also, I agree with the idea of a ‘red letter Christian’ but only in part. The Old Testament exists with purpose and to only claim the red letters is I feel at best misunderstood and at worst ignorant. However, I also understand what you mean by it and it is a beautiful thing to be truly a “Christian” in the literal sense of the word.
Now onto my bike ride.
Forgiveness in one sense of the English word could be considered an act of love yes? Paul gives us a depiction of what is one method of using love to change people ,Romans 12:20, and he actually refers to Proverbs 25:21-22.
21: If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink;
22: For you will heap burning coals on his head, And the LORD will reward you.
In my western mind I read (and have even been told) that these burning coals are the same thing as shaming your enemy. Or this act of love will make them uncomfortable in a way that will cause them to act in some response.
But the Bible was written in an eastern mindset, and seeing as both Jesus and Paul were Jewish, they were raised in this eastern tradition. To them, any reference in the texts to a fire was a symbol of the presence of God.
Why is this the case?
Genesis 15:17 God showed up to make a covenant with Abram. What happens is that in Abram’s place we see a picture a smoking firepot and a burning torch took the place of Abram. This is the first time that a picture of coals exist in the Bible, so in tradition of first use every reference to burning coals is a direct reference to the presence of God.
So in Proverbs 25, the wisdom that is passed on is not to make your enemies uncomfortable, but rather to bring them into the presence of God.
I believe that because God has forgiven us first, that we are also called to forgive in the same manner. We must forgive without hesitation so that we may bring God’s presence to those who have wronged us.